I know I keep referencing dates in my blog but I have been DYING to write this post about November 19th. November 19th is so dear to my heart because it is the day we found out we were expecting our sweet Livvy Lou.
If you haven’t heard how we found out and all the of the strange occurrences that happened up to it then you are in for a real treat. I will start by saying if you know my family then you know that many family members have struggled with fertility and even childbirth. Not to get too deep in my sister’s business but she struggled for a few years and finally conceived through IVF. January of 2014 she welcomed my perfect niece and nephew who I can’t believe are almost three.
With that being said, I truly thought it would be a struggle for me to get pregnant. Earlier in the year I thought I had the WORST kidney infection of my life. I made my mom take me to urgent care and after what felt like a million tests they concluded I had cysts all over my ovaries and they were rupturing. It. was. so. painful. The doctor even said that I would probably struggle with getting pregnant one day but I thought it was a long way down the road and became at peace with the mantra “if it’s meant to be then it will be”.
Moving forward- Eric and I fell in love fast and hard. There was no doubt in my mind that he was the one for me. I loved that he was so professional at work (oops, we met at work) and I also loved that he was the life of the party when he went out. After that first night of hanging out, I knew something was different. As much as I was fighting feelings because I was worried what people would think I knew I was falling in love. I called my best friend Liz and updated her on this new guy who I knew would need her approval if I he was going to be a part of my life. Labor day weekend came around and Liz flew in for a few days. I knew this was the perfect opportunity to see how Eric would do around my best friend. We had the BEST time. I called Liz as soon as she got back to Minneapolis and immediately asked what she thought of him. She loved him and could tell I was truly happy and wished us the best.
By the end of September, Eric told me he loved me and it just escalated from there. We spent every single day together and loved each other down. We knew we wanted each other’s babies and to be married but we never expected it to be so soon. We talked about our futures and what we wanted out of life and we both agreed that no matter what it was that it was with each other.
Another one of my best friend’s was getting married October 17th and I asked Eric to be my date. We headed down on a Friday afternoon and had a long drive to Big Cedar Lodge. It was the most beautiful wedding in my favorite place in Missouri (Branson) and let’s just say we had so much fun we decided to procreate but we didn’t know. Our next few weekends were packed with plans and little did I know Liv was in my belly.
Halloween weekend we headed to Minneapolis to spend the weekend with Liz and on the way home I had to pee every hour. I joked with Eric about being pregnant but I had told Eric about my history of cysts and that it was nearly impossible for me to pregnant. A couple of weekends after that we went to the zoo and made jokes with each other about babies staring at us. I teased Eric that when we did have a baby that I wanted a specific type of stroller (the Bugaboo Cameleon, duh) and as were about to leave the zoo I tripped on the curb and sprained my ankle.
I was laying on the ground bawling my eyes out because it hurt so bad. The zoo EMT’s came and drove me back to my car and by this point my ankle was so swollen and purple. I decided to make a trip to Urgent Care and when I got there they took me back for an x-ray. The sweet tech came around and asked if there was any chance I could be pregnant. I thought about it for a second then said, “no, absolutely not!” She went back behind the glass to get started and then came back out and said, “well, let’s just put this over your belly just to be safe.” Holy divine intervention.
That next Wednesday was November 18th and Eric and I got into a little fight. I honestly don’t remember what the fight was over because I was so hormonal and irrational (thanks pregnancy) but I will never forget the text he sent me the morning of the 19th. His text said, “If I did I wouldn’t care and love you as much as I do. I couldn’t imagine myself without you by my side and when I see myself in the future I see you right next to my side with little baby Schupps running around being crazy just like their Momma.” That night Eric brought pregnancy tests home because he apparently knew more about my own body than I did.
I took the first one and it did nothing. I had convinced myself that it wasn’t a faulty test but that it was negative and we had nothing to worry about. Right before I was about to go to bed, Eric convinced me to take one more (he bought a three pack). I was not nervous at all so I ran to the bathroom and waited for the results knowing that it would be negative. When I say I wasn’t nervous I literally wasn’t nervous. Not even a single ounce. I went to check the results of the test as it was laying on the side of the tub and that’s when our lives changed forever.
In the most apprehensive, low voice you can imagine I yelled, “Eriicccccccc.” He immediately knew the answer without me showing him. Time stood still and we didn’t say a word except hold each other while laying in bed. I took the third one just to be safe and sure enough it was positive too. We grew up in that moment.
The next day I called into work because I couldn’t stop crying. I had a million thoughts running through my mind and to be honest they weren’t very positive. I was scared to death to tell my family, friends, and coworkers. I was worried what people would think and I was worried that Eric would leave me since we weren’t married. I felt like I was too young to be a mom and how could I bring a child into this world when I still felt like a child myself?
The next day Eric was watching ESPN and a commercial came on about being a new dad. He came into my bedroom (I still had not left bed) and looked me in the eyes. He told me that from that moment on he was ready to be a father and would stand by my side and never leave me or our little nugget. I knew right then and there that everything was going to be okay and we could get through it.
Fast forward a year and oh my gosh-does God work in mysterious ways or what?! I couldn’t imagine life without Olivia. She makes my heart burst and is truly the sweetest, funniest little babe. I know this little girl was meant to be on Earth and will do big things and I cannot wait to watch her take on the world.
I don’t want to sound cliche but, life throws you curve balls and you have to roll with the punches. If you are ever scared or have big life changes please reach out to me! I have been there. I have cried my eyes out terrified of the future because I have no idea what will happen. I can tell you I have learned to be a peace with what’s meant to be will always be.
I hope y’all have a Merry Christmas! I can’t wait to celebrate with my sweet hubby and Livvy Lou. I’m soaking up her first Christmas because it’s true- time flies too fast.